An International Analogy

Imagine you had a neighbour. For the most part, this neighbour is a pretty good one. He keeps his lawn neatly mown, he paints his half of the fence, and he never parks so that your driveway is blocked. There have been a few incidents, though - like the time he refused to let you cut down a tree that straddled the two properties, and refused to pay his fair share of the removal when he finally agreed, or admit that he'd ever been in the wrong.

Well, recently, because you live in such a beautifully safe neighbourhood (I realize this strains the suspension of disbelief a bit, but bear with me) you've left your back door unlocked occasionally. After all, all your neighbours know it's your house, and they're not going to go inside. Right?

Wrong.

The neighbour in question doesn't see anything wrong with going in the back door while you're looking the other way, decsending the stairs to your basement, and pawing through your stuff. He doesn't take anything - this time. What's more, he doesn't readily admit that the back door is to YOUR HOUSE, and that there are laws keeping him out.

What do you do?

Well, the first time, you probably just ask him to leave and talk about him behind his back when your family comes over for dinner. The second time, you consider calling the police or installing a security system. By the third time, you're starting to get really mad. You see, after all the times you've left the back door unlocked, you've discovered the lock no longer works and repairing it will be a hassle.

Note to Mr. Bush: the door to our arctic is undefended, at the moment. That's because everyone knows it's ours - or at least, everyone except you.

Keep your submarines out of our arctic. You have Alaska. You have Panama. You don't need to be up there when the oil and mineral deposits there do not belong to you. If you wish to acknowledge our sovereignty of the region and make a deal allowing you to traverse it (after first notifying the owner of the house, i.e. the government in Ottawa, every time) I'm sure that can be arranged. But coming in without permission is rude. It makes you look sneaky - not a big stretch, but still. It also makes us wonder when you're going to try to claim parts of that territory for yourself. We know exactly how valuable those mineral deposits are, and we're not going to let you get away with planting a flag on OUR land and claiming its riches for yourself. We will defend it - perhaps by starting to break parts of that treaty that actually interest you. Remember that treaty? The one you've been ignoring at your convenience for years now? NAFTA? Yeah, that. It gives you the right to purchase 70% of our oil. That's a rather large chunk of treaty that we could start ignoring, as you've been ignoring other parts of it for quite some time. Just imagine how good it would be for your economy to have your nearest source of oil cut off because you couldn't keep your paws off other people's stuff.

Note to Mr. Harper: I didn't vote for you, and probably never will. But if telling the U.S. to get out of the Arctic, and actually putting some bite in the bark, is your first act as PM, I'll be quite willing to admit that in one area at least, you've already outclassed your predecessor.

Edit: Links, for the sake of our American friends: http://www.cbc.ca/story/canada/national/2006/01/26/wilkins-harper060126.html

http://www.cbc.ca/story/canadavotes2006/national/2005/12/22/elxn-harper-dfens.html