Clarification can seem so cold, so I approach this clarification with both warmth, humour and caution, and the proviso that it's really only because we're still getting to know each other.
I guess, first off, I don't think you would have rubbed me the wrong way regardless of if I knew you through lj or not- You're a bright, spirited and warm-hearted conversationalist. Your interaction with your husband spoke volumes about your personality, and you have a sparkle in your eye that I like. There was one person who DID rub me the wrong way, but that's only one out of a big group of strangers, so hey... that's not bad.
And this, not so much clarification as musing and simple response...I don't think of it as acting so much as chosing which facets I am going to emphasize at any given moment. That was as much me as the quiet more introverted me who kicks around in her pj's at home all day, or the introspective writer. All are equally me, and all are rooted in my genuine self. The only time I feel I really deviate from my true self is when I'm insecure around volitile authority figures, such as one of my bosses.
And this, certainly clarification, (but infused with humour, and only because I fear that if you're a perfectionist that my lack of perfectionistic qualities, especially if you're expecting them, might horrify you!) ---I agree with you that we do have lots in common with each other. The only thing that I think may have been misinterpreted is the perfectionism thing. I work hard and I demand a lot from myself, true, but I'm also very gentle with myself and quick to redefine success at the drop of a hat. It's one of the few non-virgo qualities I have - I'm super analytical, but I never was a perfectionist, and in fact so much the opposite that I drove my mom bonkers - messy room, sloppy writing, bad spelling (which I really have to watch as an english teacher, but I rarely spell-check my lj entries) carefree to the verge of self-sabotage at times... I still don't make my bed, and the house is a mess, but it's full of laughter, love, play, and many levels of safety. I guess that's perfection to me. The one thing that might be a kind of exception is my people skills and my need to please- I have to learn to give myself a break if I accidently upset someone. Of course, there are a large number of people who I could care less what they think (the ever menacing 'they') but if it's someone who I respect and value personally then I struggle if I feel they are upset with me. Oh, and now that I give it some thought, my cooking. I'm human, and I fret about things like everyone else, and can occasionally be self-critical, but it never lasts for long. My therapist said I was the first person she ever met who was so okay with being messed up that they could see the humour in it all.
All things in balance is my goal, and I work hard but balance it with a healthy 'screw-it' attitude, and it serves me well most of the time.
silly ramblings from a happy girl
I guess, first off, I don't think you would have rubbed me the wrong way regardless of if I knew you through lj or not- You're a bright, spirited and warm-hearted conversationalist. Your interaction with your husband spoke volumes about your personality, and you have a sparkle in your eye that I like. There was one person who DID rub me the wrong way, but that's only one out of a big group of strangers, so hey... that's not bad.
And this, not so much clarification as musing and simple response...I don't think of it as acting so much as chosing which facets I am going to emphasize at any given moment. That was as much me as the quiet more introverted me who kicks around in her pj's at home all day, or the introspective writer. All are equally me, and all are rooted in my genuine self. The only time I feel I really deviate from my true self is when I'm insecure around volitile authority figures, such as one of my bosses.
And this, certainly clarification, (but infused with humour, and only because I fear that if you're a perfectionist that my lack of perfectionistic qualities, especially if you're expecting them, might horrify you!) ---I agree with you that we do have lots in common with each other. The only thing that I think may have been misinterpreted is the perfectionism thing. I work hard and I demand a lot from myself, true, but I'm also very gentle with myself and quick to redefine success at the drop of a hat. It's one of the few non-virgo qualities I have - I'm super analytical, but I never was a perfectionist, and in fact so much the opposite that I drove my mom bonkers - messy room, sloppy writing, bad spelling (which I really have to watch as an english teacher, but I rarely spell-check my lj entries) carefree to the verge of self-sabotage at times... I still don't make my bed, and the house is a mess, but it's full of laughter, love, play, and many levels of safety. I guess that's perfection to me.
The one thing that might be a kind of exception is my people skills and my need to please- I have to learn to give myself a break if I accidently upset someone. Of course, there are a large number of people who I could care less what they think (the ever menacing 'they') but if it's someone who I respect and value personally then I struggle if I feel they are upset with me. Oh, and now that I give it some thought, my cooking. I'm human, and I fret about things like everyone else, and can occasionally be self-critical, but it never lasts for long. My therapist said I was the first person she ever met who was so okay with being messed up that they could see the humour in it all.
All things in balance is my goal, and I work hard but balance it with a healthy 'screw-it' attitude, and it serves me well most of the time.