Writer's Block: Take Your Chances

[velvetpage]

[Error: unknown template qotd]

Yes, I do, on one condition: that they're trying to improve the situation for next time.

I had a poster many years ago, an early version of an lolcat, that had a picture of a kitten in a difficult situation (peering wetly out of a watering can and looking miserable, I believe) that said, "Be patient, God isn't finished with me yet." So long as you're not writing off nasty behaviour as the "way you are" and claiming you can't help it, you'll get a second chance to fix it from me.

Now, heaven help you if you try to tell me that your bad behaviour is someone else's fault, or whatever. I can lecture as only a teacher can.

Comments

[integritysinger.livejournal.com]

in response to the previous entry about it not being a good day for you, take it from someone who knows.
#1 - take a nap or go to bed early
#2 - if that doesn't fix the blues/funk, then get outdoors and soak in some Vit D and some fresh O2
#3 - if the blues/funk persist, call a gal pal and schedule a coffee date
#4 - if after the coffee date the blues/funk persist, call the doc and discuss

that is the tried and true method I use. Thyroid sufferers are prone to depression. I have managed to ward off a depression for six years! i feel like one is coming on lately but I think it's the curent life challenges, not wonky neurotransmitters so I keep applying my four steps and I find that I rarely have to get to step 3, let alone 4.

be well friend. cut yourself some slack. allow your body to heal!

[kisekileia.livejournal.com]

There is truth in this.

Erin, you are allowed to relax, chill out, "waste time" (I put that in quotation marks because if it relaxes you, helps you recover, or helps you feel better, it's not wasted time), etc. Really. You're still recovering from major surgery. And that, I'm guessing, is why friends may not be initiating events with you--they probably aren't sure if you'd be well enough and don't want to pressure you to do more than you can handle. I think it makes sense for you to let people know if you'd like to spend time with them, since that'll make them aware that you're well enough physically to want to socialize and hurting enough emotionally that you need to socialize.

Speaking of chat programs, do you have AIM/iChat?

[velvetpage.livejournal.com]

The problem this week has been Claire getting sick. It's incredibly hard to not pick up a sick toddler who just wants to snuggle, and I've overdone it badly the last four days. So I haven't been able to relax or take it easy, and since we thought Claire had the flu, I wasn't able to socialize much, either.

I don't have either of those chat programs; all I really use is gmail and sometimes facebook chat.

[kisekileia.livejournal.com]

Aww, I can understand how not picking up a sick snuggly Claire-bear would be hard.

I wonder whether Gmail chat coordinates with iChat. Even if it doesn't, I have a Gmail address, so I could probably try using that for Gmail's chat program on either my computer or my new BlackBerry.

[lady-mitzi.livejournal.com]

I agree with integritysinger entirely and wanted to add that your post rang some enormous bells with me, particularly the last line. Sadly I have no answers!

I liked this writers' block prompt. I don't usually find them very interesting, but I might start checking it out again!

xx

[morpheus0013.livejournal.com]

Now, heaven help you if you try to tell me that your bad behaviour is someone else's fault, or whatever. I can lecture as only a teacher can.

I agree with you on this, up to a certain point. I think there are some behaviors and modes of thinking that are so ingrained--whether that's from childhood exprience/trauma, personality, whatever it is--that can't just be changed overnight. I know there are certain behaviors and thought processes that I have that repeat over and over. Do I try to rectify the situations they create? Yes. Do I try to be aware of what I'm saying/doing and why? Yes. But up to a certain point, I cannot control my immediate reactions to some things. It's not being unwilling, it simply is being unable. That does NOT give me a free pass to act like a jerk with impunity, but it DOES mean that those around me need to understand so they can cope with it and we can all keep moving forward.

Does that make sense? I wasn't criticizing your answer, simply trying to put out there that "I can't help it" can, in some ways, be a legitimate reason for behavior. But again, not carte blanche to act like a jerk, either. More of an entry point to understand how some people tick.

[velvetpage.livejournal.com]

I understand the concept of, "I can't help it right at that second, but I'm trying," and I accept that as valid. What bugs me is things like this one kid I teach who believes that he doesn't have to be nice to anyone right off the bat - he can wait and see if they treat him well before he decides whether or not to give them basic courtesy. *headdesk* And no matter how many times we've had the discussion, he doesn't see why that doesn't work. Nor does he understand that his abrasive attitude makes people less likely to give him the benefit of the doubt, so he in turn doesn't give THEM the benefit of the doubt. That kid has so many vicious circles going on, it's amazing he doesn't spend quite all his time chasing his tail like an angry Dobermann puppy.

[morpheus0013.livejournal.com]

The kid you describe must have a tough life, if that's the way he approaches it. I feel bad for him, but I can also understand why people likely don't bother with him too much.

I'm always torn on these things. It's another of those issues many people seem to go all-or-nothing on: if you extend some understanding of circumstance, you're excusing behavior. If you don't extend any understanding of circumstance, you're a heartless ass. I think I'm more of a gradient type; there are differences between an excuse and an explanation.

[velvetpage.livejournal.com]

I try to use the gradient variation, too, and sometimes it gets me into trouble; I have more difficulty than some teachers getting kids to hand in work on time, for example.

And yes, that kid does have a hard life in a lot of ways, most of them not his fault.